Because ...

I have just discovered the power of the word 'because'. I was just told that I was doing a really good job, yet I felt vaguely unsatisfied. I realised afterwards it was because he never used the word 'because'. An encouraging comment made without specific reference to a particular behaviour is just a platitude. An encouraging comment which specifies 'because' is incredibly motivating and powerful. So don't forget the 'because ...'.

Habits

Habits can helpful in that they enable us to get things done without having to make decisions all the time. I have a habit of running which means I don't have to decide how I am going to exercise. I have a schedule written down and I just follow it, no major thinking or decision needed.
Habits can also be like ruts that keep us tied in. We have always done this thing this way and we don't even consider doing things differently.
Christians have a habit of meeting for church services weekly. This could be a good habit in that it helps us connect and grow. This could also be an excuse for not thinking about whether this is the best way of achieving God's purposes.
Think about some of your regular habits and ask the question: Is this habit achieving the purpose for which I started the habit? If yes, just continue or refine. If no, then spend some time thinking about your higher purpose and what changes might be required to form a new better and more productive habit.

Matt 6:25-27

Matt 6:25-27 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

What is the challenge for you from these verses?
Stephen Covey in his classic, and highly recommended book, '7 habits of Highly Effective People' talks about keeping the 'First Thing First', that is focus on the big and important issues rather than the trivial issues. What is the big issue in this passage for you?
What habits might help you keep focus on the big issues? (Brain storm ideas and then pick one technique that might work for you. Examples: Writing a daily list of goals to keep focus on the big things. Putting trivial issues on a notepad where you can attend to them when you have time and don't need to worry about remembering them. Reading the bible everyday. etc.)
Spend some time in prayer/contemplation about the ways that God is providing for you. Give thanks for all he is doing.

Discipleship Habit 13 Healthy Living

Changes Happening

Overview: In the next little while I'm re-organising previous and new blogs to focus around the 13 core discipleship habits that form the basis of Impact Community Church of which I am the founding and current Pastor. I will still make comments on a variety of themes, but the guts will be writing daily devotionals based on a systematic exploration of the New Testament and organised into the 13 Discipleship habits. You can find a list and explanation of these at www.impactcommunitychurch.net/discipleship.html

Matthew 6:24

Matt 6: 24 "No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money."

Do you control money or does money control you? When money controls you, you aren't free to serve God as he calls you to.
Here is an interesting definition of being wealthy. 'You are wealthy when you earn more money than you spend!' Are you wealthy? A truly wealthy person has the ability to make choices to serve in ways that a person controlled by money can't.
According to this definition, that I personally really like, wealth is not about how much you earn, but how you have control over what you spend.
There are lots of people who earn heaps and spend even more and thus really are poor.
But let's go further. I believe true financial wealth is ... (1) the ability to spend less than you earn, and (2) the ability to give away significant amounts of what you earn to help others.

I believe a practice most people can realisitically achieve is this. Give away the first 10% of what you earn. Invest the next 10% in long term investments. Save the next 10% for special expenses such as holidays and the like. Then live on the remaining 70%.
If that seems too much then start with 1% in each area and seek to increase it by 1% every 3-6 months until you have control over money. If you are at 10% then consider going even higher by increasing by 1% each year.

Imagine if you could look back over your life and rather than consider how much you have earned and gained could focus on how much you'd given away to help others.
Imagine instead of seeking to be a millionaire you had a legacy of having given away a million dollars.

Discipleship Habit 07 Generosity
Discipleship Question: Are you generous in giving away to others?

Matthew 6:22-23

Discipleship Habit 12 Holy and Peaceable Life
Discipleship Question: Are you living a holy and peaceable life that is attractive to others?

Matthew 6:22-23 "The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

We live in a culture where our eyes are assaulted daily with messages contrary to that which is good for our soul.
Which issues particularly impact you through your eyes? (Consumerism that seeks to entice you to buy what you don't need, sexually explicit images, etc)
Someone once said that seeing something wrong isn't the sin, it's dwelling on it that is the issue. This is only partly true, as sometimes we place ourselves in situations where we can see things that we ought not to see. Where might these places/situations be for you?
Do you have strategy for moving the focus on your eyes to better things? What is it and is it working for you?
Is there anything you need to ask God and/or others to help you with in regard to your eyes?

Matthew 6:19-21

Discipleship Habit 07 Generosity
Discipleship Question: Are you generous in giving away to others?
This is one of the most important teachings in Scripture in terms of our current consumerist culture where we equate the 'good life' with what we have.

• Take an inventory of what you own and compare this with what you've given away.
• How much do you earn each week and compare this with what you give away each week.
• What if God asked you to give away some of your treasured items, would you?
• Consider how much time and effort you give to gathering resources compared to how much time and effort you give to deepening your relationship with God and loving others.
• Where is your treasure, really? Ask God to reveal what is in your heart and ask him to give you a heart that truly seeks after him as your ultimate treasure.
  

Matthew 6:16-18

Discipleship Habit 03 Devotional Life
Discipleship Question: Discipleship Reflection Question: Do you set time aside on a regular basis to be alone, commune and build up your personal relationship with God?
Fasting is spiritual discipline whereby we stop something for a period of time to exercise control and honour God. It might be like Jesus and Moses did, fasting from food for 40 days, or it might be fasting for example from one meal a day for one week, or from a particular form of food for a period of time, or from a habit such as watching TV, or even from normal sexual relations with our husband/wife. (But the bible warns this must be done with mutual consent and only for a short period. See 1 Corinthians 7:1-5.) Normally the time that would be used to eat/watch etc, would be used to spend in prayer.

• What does this passage say about the attitude we should have while fasting?
• What is the result of right fasting?
• Have you ever fasted, from what and for how long and what was the result?
• Is there an area of your life that you want spiritual breakthrough in, could fasting be something you could try as a means by which God can give you spiritual strength and/or insight?
• A few good books on Fasting are: 'This Chosen Fast' by Matt Madigan (friend of mine) or 'Fasting for Spiritual Breakthrough' by Elmer L Towns.
• It is a general guideline to start your fasting habit in a small way and it maybe helpful to ask others about their fasting habits to get some ideas and insights.
  

Matthew 6:9-15

Discipleship Habit 03 Devotional Life
Discipleship Question: Discipleship Reflection Question: Do you set time aside on a regular basis to be alone, commune and build up your personal relationship with God?
Some people use this model prayer as something to recite, which may be helpful, but is not really its purpose. The purpose of it is to provide a framework to pray with our own words.

• Go through the prayer line by line and summarise in your own words the key themes that come up.
  
• Now pray using the key theme's as prompters.
• Share your outline and the results of your prayers with others.
• Write the key themes on a small card and place it in your wallet to refer to whenever you have time throughout the day to spend some time in prayer. For example each time you have to wait in a line you might pray for the next theme and in this way pray through all of the themes each day.

Matthew 6:5-8

Discipleship Habit 03 Devotional Life
Discipleship Question: Discipleship Reflection Question: Do you set time aside on a regular basis to be alone, commune and build up your personal relationship with God?
Jesus begins to teach us about one of the central practices of a follower of God, the practice of private prayer.

• What do you learn from this passage?
  
• Spend some time in reflection on the practice of prayer in your life up to this point, how does it measure against the principles of this passage?
  
• Describe what prayer means for you, how you've practiced it, and the place it has for you now.
• Think of at least one person that you admire as a person of prayer and ask them to describe their prayer habit to see if you can learn from them.
• Consider what a prayer goal for you might be. Example 1: I will at least 5 times a week rise at 6am and spend 15 minutes in private prayer. OR Example 2: For the next week whenever I ... I will spend a few minutes in prayer.
• Buy the book 'The Hour that Changes the World' by Dick Eastman. It is available at Koorong.com.au or Word.com.au
  

Matthew 6:1-4 Part 2

Discipleship Habit 07 Generosity
Discipleship Question: Are you generous in giving away to others?
As part of Matthew's arguement he uses the idea of giving to the needy, it isn't the essence of what he is teaching, but it is an assumption of something we should do.

• In what ways do you help those less fortunate than yourself? Write down what percentage of your income is given away and actually helps the poor or those in need.
• As a local church we give 10-20% of our offerings away to others. How much of your local church offering is used to help those who need help?
• It is important not only to give money but also time. What are some ways you can use your time to help others?
• How could you use your energy to help others. Example: The church I was Pastor of took 16 people to Fiji to build a home for a widow. We weren't all builders but we could use our labour to help.
• Make a list of some of your skills. How could these be used to help others? E.g. If you are an accountant you might help others with their budgets.
• What specifically are you going to do in the next 28 days to help someone else?
  

Matthew 6:1-4 Part 1

We are introduced in verse 1 to a very interesting idea, the idea of reward. In verses 1,2,3,6 & 17 this word reward is used. Interestingly it is not a reference to eternal life, for that is not a reward for actions but an act of mercy and grace received by faith. Here it seems there is reward in addition to eternal life.

• What do you think the reward might be referring to?
• How do you feel about the idea that for those who get eternal life, there are additional rewards according to our obedience and faithfulness here on earth?
• Read 1 Corinthians 3:10-15 Verse 11 says that the only foundation is Jesus Christ. Verse 12 following talks about what we build ON that foundation, that is our good works. That is we are saved by faith in Jesus, but upon that foundation we ought to build a life that honours God by good works for which those who have eternal life will be rewarded.
• Do you realise that there is no work you can do to earn eternal life, you must simply believe in God's promise of life through Jesus to you? (See John 3:16-21)
  
• Those who believe Jesus will then naturally seek to do works that honour him, and our faithfulness in this matter will have a reward. How might this truth influence the way you live now?
  

Matthew 5:43-48

Discipleship Habit 01 Love
Discipleship Reflection Question: Do you live a life that evidences that you love God, Self and Others?
Jesus continues to hammer at us about this theme of love and narrows it down to a very specific action, that of loving your enemies.

• Make a list of people in your life who would fall into the category of those you dislike, who oppose you, whom you might call an enemy. (If you find it hard, think about people who you are uncomfortable in the presence of, people who you wouldn't like to be stuck in a room.)
  
• For each person think of what specifically it is you don't like about them or what they've done to you or someone else.
• Now ask God to help you pray (v44) for each of these people and begin to give you a heart of forgiveness and love for them.
• For three of these people, what is one practical action of love you could take to reach out to them and to extend forgiveness through your actions. (Examples: You might like to send a note thanking them for somethign you appreciate about them. You might like to invite them for a coffee. You might look for an opportunity to say something nice about them in a conversation.)

Important note: Forgiveness does not necessarily imply a lack of wisdom. For example if someone has stolen from your business, you can forgive them, but it doesn't mean you would put them back in a position whereby they could steal from you again. Or, if this is a person who has abused you or someone else, then forgiveness does not mean putting yourself or others in a position where abuse can happen again.

Matthew 5:38-42

Discipleship Habit 01 Love
Discipleship Reflection Question: Do you live a life that evidences that you love God, Self and Others?
Here we have a teaching that strikes at the heart of a Christian worldview that is so contrary to the world. It is from passages like this that Martin Luther King and Gandi got their views about non-violent protest and resistance from.

• How does this passage relate to Matthew 5:9?
• What are the practical challenges that come to mind when reflecting on this passage?
• Are you a violent or non-violent reactor by nature, why?
• In what situations do you find it hard to respond in the way described in this passage?
• When looking at the life of Jesus we find he never defends himself, though there are a few occassions he defends others. Can you think of any occassions where Jesus defends others?
• Spend time asking God to create in you a heart that seeks to forgive and not respond, particularly pray for the situations and/or people that stir you to a more violent or demonstrative reaction.
  

The Practice of Forgiveness using REACH

[from 'Authentic Happiness' by Martin Seligman]

RECALL the hurt, in as objective a way as you can. Do not think of the other person as evil. Do not wallow in self-pity. Take deep, slow, and calming breaths as you visualise the event.

EMPATHISE by trying to understand from the perpetrator’s point of view why this person hurt you. This is not easy, but make up a plausible story that the transgressor might tell if challenged to explain. To help you do this, remember the following:

• When others feel their survival is threatened, they will hurt innocents.
• People who attack others are themselves usually in a state of fear, worry, and hurt.
• The situation a person finds himself / herself in, and not his/her underlying personality, can lead to hurting.
• People often don’t think when they hurt others; they just lash out.

ALTRUISTIC gift of forgiveness. First recall a time you transgressed, felt guilty, and were forgiven. This was a gift you were given by another person because you needed it, and you were grateful for this gift. Giving this gift usually makes us feel better. As the saying goes:

If you want to be happy … for an hour, take a nap … for a day, go fishing … for a month, get married … for a year, get an inheritance … for a lifetime, help someone.

But we do not give this gift out of self-interest. Rather, we give it because it is for the trespasser’s own good. Tell yourself you can rise above hurt and vengeance. If you give the gift grudgingly, however, it will not set you free.

COMMIT yourself to forgive publicly. Write a letter of forgiveness to the offender, or write a poem or song, or tell a trusted friend. These are all contracts of forgiveness that lead to the final step.

HOLD onto forgiveness. This is another difficult step, because memories of the event will surely recur. Forgiveness is not erasure; rather, it is a change in the tag lines that a memory carries. It is important to realise that the memories do not mean unforgiveness. Don’t dwell vengefully on the memories, and don’t wallow in them. Remind yourself that you have forgiven, and read the documents you have composed.

Matthew 5:33-37

Discipleship Habit 12 Holy and Peaceable Life
Discipleship Question: Are you living a holy and peaceable life that is attractive to others?
We are called to be people of our word, that when we say something we mean it, and there is no room for misunderstanding about it.

• Who is the person who best illustrates this truth in your life? What do you admire about them?
• Who are people/professions that you naturally distrust because their word is untrustworthy?
• In what circumstances in your life are you likely to hedge on your commitments?
• In what ways do you add additional words to your yes or no? E.g. I've heard people promise on the life of their child/mother/bible etc.
• Spend some time asking God for insight for things you need to confess and clean up in your life regarding being a person of integrity.
• What thing do you need to change in your life as a result of this lesson?
• Who might you share this insight with and ask to pray with or for you about this?
  

Matthew 5:31-32

Discipleship Habit 12 Holy and Peaceable Life
Discipleship Question: Are you living a holy and peaceable life that is attractive to others?
This passage is a good example of being careful not to read a few passages in isolation. The teaching of the bible on marriage and divorce can be a bit difficult to get to grips with. You may wish to do some wider reading on the topic. Books like 'Counterpoints: Remarriage After Divorce in Today's Church (3 Views)' by Paul Engle (Ed) give a variety of viewpoints on this important topic.

• On reading this passage what thoughts or questions are raised?
• In this particular passage Jesus was replying against an easy divorce position which was that you just had to give a 'certificate of divorce' to your wife and you were divorced. Why might Jesus have been so tough on an 'easy divorce' situation?
• Who is the party that Jesus is criticising the most? (A unmarried women in Jesus culture could find it hard to survive, hence she would need to re-marry quickly, whose fault is this in this passage?)
• Does the passage on adultery (5:27-30) that precedes and the passage on oaths (5:33-37) that follows this passage, give you a wider perpsective on the issue of divorce discussed here?
• Important note: God's purpose is to love us, he forgives us for our failings and calls us to love in action in our future, so if you've been divorced don't allow this passage to condemn you, seek forgiveness and healing and then move forward in the love of God for you.
  

Matthew 5:27-30

Discipleship Habit 12 Holy and Peaceable Life
Discipleship Question: Are you living a holy and peaceable life that is attractive to others?

Often our concern is primarily with the outside behaviour not the inside attitudes, Jesus challenges this.

• As you read this text what questions and thoughts are raised?
• Jesus equates lust with adultery, how do you feel about this?
• Jesus solution is a radical one. Most people believe he is not literally saying 'pluck out your eye' but is using an analogy to make a strong point that has been termed 'radical amputation' by some. What do you think?
• Are you prepared to take Jesus seriously in dealing with any sin in your life? If not, why not?
• Write down what you believe is an issue in your life the God wants to deal with and change.
• What would you need to get rid of to help you live in holiness in this area of your life? (Example: If pornography is a problem you may need to get rid of internet access.) Create a list, prioritise them and then ask God what he is asking you to do and do it!
• For dealing with issues such as pornography, over eating, substance abuse, etc, check out the recommended website www.settingcaptivesfree.com/
  

Matthew 5:25-26

Discipleship Habit 07 Generosity
Discipleship Question: Are you generous in giving away to others?
Here is a situation where it a person is being taken to court for a debt that they have incurred and we are informed that it would be wise to deal with the situation quickly and early rather than waiting for a judge to make a decision.

• What natural and spiritual lessons do you draw from this short illustration?
• Take an inventory of your life. What debts do you owe? Spiritual, emotional, financial?
• Think through your debts, what is a possible negative outcome of not dealing with that debt in long-term?
• Pick the debt you feel is weighing you down the most and devise a simple plan of how you can dispose of that debt. Ask God for wisdom to know what to do and to have courage to do it.
• Be open to sharing your struggle with a fellow believer and to ask for their support and help.
• Tell the story of your victory or success in your small group when it is done.
  

Matthew 5:23-24

Discipleship Habit 01 Love
Discipleship Reflection Question: Do you live a life that evidences that you love God, Self and Others?

Reading: Matt 5:23-24

One of the problems we face is doing the important versus easy thing. Giving an offering is needed but is relatively easy as it involves our wealth but not our self. Dealing with reconciliation is a much harder thing as it will necessarily involve sacrificing some emotional energy and maybe much much more.

• What are some of the habits of your faith that you find relatively easy to do?
• What are some of the habits of your faith do you avoid because they are much harder?
• Is there any particular things you know you ought to do but have been procrasitinating on?
• Is there anyone in your life you need to reconcile with?
• Even if the fault is 99% with the other person, which is unlikely, what is at least some part that you can take responsibility for?
• Are you willing to go to that person, acknowledge the aspect you are responsible for, and seek to reconcile?
• You may require some outside help. If this is so, who might you go to for wisdom and help?
• What is the next step for you? (It might be as simple as committing to pray for that person every day for a week.) Once that step is complete what will be your second step, and so on until the reconciliation is complete?